Hey Dolls, my name is Kristina Adleina and I want to welcome you to my Blog, this is my first unofficial post for my Blog and today I am going to get into my personal backstory and why I decided to start a blog in the first place.
I am hoping that by sharing my life story that it can help anyone, in any way of their lives. Also, I want to be as authentic and transparent with my readers. So, let’s get into this “All About Me” article.
Now it’s time for me to share my story and get real with you for a minute, so, let’s state the obvious here my names Kristina Adleina Fowler and I’m 29, living in Sudbury, Ontario Canada. Sudbury is a decent place to live and grow up, it’s like a bunch of little towns all connected together, it’s beautiful with that small town to feel but it’s really nothing for me to write home about. I’ve always wanted to leave here for some time now, I feel like I’ve just outgrown it all and all the people that are in it.
One day I will leave to travel the world to do makeup and to share my talents with everyone. But for now, I will keep doing Makeup, grow my Business and make Blogging my thang. So, enough about that and let’s get into who I am. Well, I am quite a unique character, I am that type A person who always needs things a certain way and meticulous about everything thing I do, very much a perfectionist. I am that take charge GirlBoss, where everything needs to be in my control but I when it is, it always turns out the bomb.
But, I am also very funny and humorous and always making everyone laugh no matter what I look like. I am also a huge geeky-silly type of chick with a hot exterior. But, I am very genuine, empathetic, generous, kind-hearted and authentic. But I will not take any crap from anyone. I love to help others and I love, love, love to make people look beautiful with my magical makeup skills. Makeup & Makeup Artistry is my number one passion and I love to sprinkle my makeup fairy dust and make everyone look beautiful and feel confident about themselves. I am very much all about empowering women and standing together as a united front because there is power in numbers and each woman is out there doing her thang and they deserve to be empowered just as much as the next lady.
Now let’s get into my family, I have a son named Ryder who is now 7 and a half, he’s getting so big very quickly. Ryder is my everything and my life if I didn’t have his big ocean blue eyes, his sandy blonde curly hair and his big funny smile looking at me every morning I don’t think I would get out of bed, what would be the point? He’s changed my life so much and has made me a better person, I am very thankful for him and I love him more and more every day. Ryder’s like most 7-year-olds, full of energy, always on the go, dislikes school, all he wants to do is play hockey and hang out with mom and dad.
Ryder’s dad, Troy is amazing with him and they love each other so much it’s crazy, almost makes me a bit jealous. I was with Troy for over 10 years and we have not been together for a while now, but we are still very close to Ryder and he will always be a part of my family. My mom, Debbie and my dad, Dave were together for about 10 years as well and they got married and had me than my little sister, Kori-Lynn who is 26 now.
My mom and I are a lot alike and we look like twins, we are so much alike that we often butt heads on things in life like parenting, but if I didn’t have my mother I don’t know where I would be. She’s always been that tough love type but always there whenever we needed her no matter what, she’s a lot like my papa (her dad) who is now passed but he was my best friend in life and still is in spirit. My sister Kori has 2 kids of her own my niece and nephew Kiara and Daylan.
My mom then remarried to my stepdad Andy and had my little brother who is 12 years younger than me, Seth who is 18 now. My dad also remarried to my stepmom Angela who already had a son, Brandon and then they had my little sister, Kansas. Which Kansas, Kiara, Ryder, and Daylan are all a year and a half apart which is funny cause Kansas is their Aunt, but they don’t see it that way. My family is huge, this is just my immediate family which doesn’t include all aunts, uncles, and cousins but I am super close with my mom’s side and they have always been there for me through everything.
Kristina is an empowered female who has been through and seen a lot in only 30 years. But those occurrences in my life have made me full of strength, knowledge, and power. I will never let anything hold me back again because there have been so many things that have held me back and I will no longer allow anything to hold me back again.
I am humbled by my life experiences and I am extremely eager to right my wrongs. I want to give anyone that has or is now on the same road, that I was once on, someone to relate to, someone to get advice from and a platform as a resource for anything they may need in life and business. I am also a very passionate and caring woman, there are so many things that I want to do with my life that I know can and will benefit others in many ways and I know that I will always strive to accomplish as much as I possibly can.
Throughout everything within my long journey, it has brought me to realize that life is to short and it can literally be over in an instant. I want to do nothing more than to live for today and to make every moment count.
Now, before I get into the nitty-gritty details, I want to mention that I do suffer from Mental Health and Addiction issues. I am not ashamed to speak about it or any part of my life, I want to be open and honest with everything because I know that it can help someone from hearing my story and maybe inspire them to do something great with their lives.
That alone is something that brings me much happiness, I want to be able to help as many people as possible with these issues and having this blog will allow me to do just that. And this is all I truly want to do.
Of course, the obvious question is what exactly do you suffer from? Personally, I suffer from “Generalized Anxiety Disorder” also known as GAD, which is characterized by persistent and excessive worry about a number of different things and affects 6.8 million adults in the U.S alone. (Anxiety and Depression Association of America)
Also, “Obsessive Compulsive Disorder” aka OCD, it is made up of two parts obsessions and compulsions, you might have one or both of these symptoms that cause a lot of distress. Obsessions are unwanted and repetitive thoughts, urges and images that don’t go away and cause a lot of anxiety. Compulsions are actions meant to reduce anxiety caused by obsessions and would experience distress if they can not complete the compulsions. (Canadian Mental Health Association)
Substance Abuse Disorder aka (SAD) Addiction is a complex disease of the brain and body that involves the compulsive use of one or more substances despite serious health and social consequences. Addiction disrupts regions of the brain that are responsible for reward, motivation, learning, judgment, and memory. It damages various body systems as well as families, relationships, schools, workplaces, and neighborhoods. (National Centre of Addiction and Substance Abuse)
I have officially diagnosed about 4 years ago now from my Psychiatrist at CMHA and I was prescribed a bunch of medication to relieve me from my symptoms, along with a bunch of work to do on myself, various programs and counseling. It was only then that I realized how serious the issue was and figuring out what I was going to do to fix it.
Now it’s time for me to share my personal experience with Mental Health and Addiction. This path in life that was given to me might have been a shitty hand but I can say I had a great childhood and I was an amazing kid growing up, but there were early signs of the OCD and the anxiety. They weren’t extreme symptoms, basically I needed to have to have everything a certain way, in a particular way and order, I had to have my hair pulled back ever so tightly so there were no “bumps in my hair” most adults would have cried from the hair pulling but I sat there every day and needed it or else I was fit to be tied.
I remember and still to this day I never did like longer socks anything that past my ankles I felt restricted and I just wasn’t having it, my clothing had to be a smooth cotton material and I never wore jeans always matching tracksuits and everything from my hair ties, to socks and shoes were always matching and I had a different suit for every day of the week and always wore each suit on that exact day of the week. I had my “babies” that were cotton fabric bears and there were three of them and to fall asleep I would have them on my face and twist my finger around the ear and tickle my face with it. Now, I had to be about 3 years old here and I remember this stuff as clear as day because it was these things that carried through to my teenage and adult years but things got different of course.
Like needing to shower twice a day and having to be so clean each time that there was literally never any hot water left for no one else and then there 4 other people who are showering on that same tank. But it wasn’t until I was 18 that I began to use hard drugs, OxyContin and fentanyl were my drugs of choice and of course, I partied before with booze and weed and experimented with other drugs. But it was when I began to use prescription pain medication that my entire life had changed with just a few pills. Things began to fall quickly out of my control and before too long drugs were my end all and be all, it was my breakfast, lunch, and supper and it was the only thing that ever understood me.
The power of these drugs grab a hold of you and completely change your identity, so much so that you can’t even look in the mirror at your reflection. They take hold of your body, mind, and soul, you become so physically dependant on using them that when you don’t have the drugs you are sick like the worst flu known to mankind times 100. They slowly begin to deteriorate your mind and your body and everyone you care about in your life want nothing to do with the person you have become, with the lying, stealing and doing anything to chase your next high.
After dealing with this type of behavior for on and off over a period of 10 years, knowing that your still lucky enough to be here on this earth. You might get clean and continue to relapse continuously because there’s no book on the right way of doing things. But it’s a hard fight and I had always wanted it no matter how many times I continued to fall back, I never wanted to go back to that life. But something was pulling me there and I know the devil was one of those things, but being through this experience and learning everything I know now had kept me there to learn so I can assist other people on the same path as myself.
So what can you do to overcome Dual Diagnosis such as these? There are many things I have tried to do and achieve over these 10 years of pain, horror, and anguish like this. I had quit on my own many times, cold turkey and I would self-medicate with weed and Ativan to subdue the pain and anxiety I would be feeling.
I had gone on methadone for a short period, went to church, went into counseling, and many other programs just like it and I had gone on suboxone for about 4 years without the consult of a doctor. After almost 10 years of not ever quite figuring it out yet I had gone in to see a Psychiatrists at our local CAMH after going through months and weeks of painstaking devastation, continuous crying and feeling like I am losing my mind and my ex-fiancé bringing me to the hospital the crisis intervention centre because he was truly scared and wasn’t sure what was going on with me.
After seen my Doctor I had started my first round of antidepressants “Cipralex” and at first they don’t kick in right away, but after a while, some of the symptoms began to clear up and for a while, I was doing good and not using. But unfortunately that all didn’t last, once everything fell apart I had decided to go on Methadone and to take it very seriously and to switch medications. The Doctor ended up weaning me off Cipralex and onto Trintellix, which is more for anxiety and OCD symptoms but still an antidepressant.
Then I started out on Methadone and the day I started on the program was the last day that I had used drugs. Now, it took time to get used to the program and needed to be there every morning and adjusting doses so that you feel normal. After 2 months of being on the program, I was eligible to start getting my carries, which is your drinks you get to bring home for the week.
After 2 months I had my full carries, so I had my life back and everything was going great with my new medication and there were no issues at all. Since then it has been well over 3 years and that first summer I had started college, I was speaking at mental health and addiction engagements telling my story, I started back up doing Makeup Artistry and I started my own little business doing makeup and much more. There have been many things I have been able to do in these 3 plus years and I am making up for lost time.
With so much time on my hands and doing makeup I felt like I finally had a purpose on this earth and starting my business gave me that purpose.
My ultimate passion in life is to make others feel beautiful with the power of my talent as an artist, to give the gift of self-confidence and to use the knowledge of my words to help heal their soul. I have always been in love with all things beauty and makeup for literally as long as I can remember. It has always given me that extra boost of confidence when I wasn’t feeling the most secure with myself and it has always allowed me to express myself, however, I wanted to.
I was 17 when I started working in a legit beauty salon, I learned all the tricks of the trade and its essentially were I truly did fall in love with all things beauty.
But I must let you in on a secret, from the time I was 12 I wanted to be a hairdresser and makeup artist. I always loved everything about beauty, the way it made me feel about myself and the connection between you and your client for lack of a better word. My Aunt was a hairdresser, I was always fascinated by everything that she did and it was always a dream to open my own salon one day.
I can remember when I was 13, heading into high school I started dying and cutting my own hair, there was a heck of a lot of trial and error, but after a few years of tragic hair misfortunes, I basically nailed it every time. As the years went on I would go into the local hairdressing school about 5 times within a short period of time and by the time I was done working at the beauty salon I knew that being a hairdresser was off the table for me. I focused in on what came more natural to me and that was Makeup Artistry & Esthetics, they had taught me everything I needed to know while working and doing my high school co-op program and I ran with it from there.
I was doing it from my home and traveling and I had all these plans for this luxurious beauty salon, my mind and heart were set for many years to come. Going through everything with my addiction and mental health issues wasn’t something that was always easy to focus on when it came with the future but, this was still my dream throughout it all. When I did get clean over 3 years ago within the first year I decided to go to College and change my profession into something that I can get a degree in that I can help others with mental health and addiction issues, so I enrolled in the Child and Youth Care Practitioner Program.
Honestly, I did so amazing in the program I was on the Dean’s Honour Roll and I was throwing out 90-100% all the time and it was all based around mental health and how to assist children and families struggling with various issues. But after my 4th semester I just felt like this wasn’t going to fill my cup every day working for children’s aid society and after my ex-fiancé went to jail while we were together I was just done with everything so, I left. But it was back to Makeup that finally pulled me out of that dark phase and it really helped me to put my focus into starting my own Makeup Artist Business.
Everything about all those situations seemed to be all for a reason now that I think back on it all and its lead me to here today and I don’t regret any of it.
As I just mentioned, starting a Business sort of just happened and it wasn’t something that I really planned on doing so soon. When I began doing makeup again I just figured I’d freelance for now and continue with my business when everything’s planned out as it should be. My girlfriend Angel and I ended up hooking up since high school, she had mentioned to me that if I needed anyone to do hair while I do makeup that she would be my girl.
So, not that long after I had one of my biggest gigs since I decided to do makeup again, we would be traveling a few hours to do makeup and hair on set for a magazine photoshoot and everything seemed to just fall into place from there. We started doing both makeup and hair services for weddings, events, graduations, photo shoots and all kinds of special occasions.
I was working with some direct sales companies as well and during a party we held we ending up meeting Alanah who wanted to sell beauty products and wanted to learn how to do makeup and hairstyling, it seemed like a fit so we went ahead with teaching her the ins and outs of the trade. As we had more hands on deck we decided to expand by doing our own photoshoots with models and photographers to hopefully create great content for magazines and hold our own events.
That summer we tested it out and held maybe 5 of our own events and it was really fun, something I could see myself doing but it was a lot of work to do everything plus what I was already doing and it just didn’t seem like anyone else was truly invested in any of it.
Also doing the whole direct sale cosmetics gig was not a fit what so ever, they wanted me to be the owner/operator of my territory with no previous experience, no one under me I was to start from square one and they basically helped with nothing so I had to make a choice. Anyways, with all these new changes I had to make many of my own changes as well, so I basically decided to distance myself from everything and everyone, then to continue to do what I was doing when I first started out, so I would do makeup, hairstyling, esthetics and do makeup lessons as well.
Then I wanted to get in with technology and the way of the internet so I decided to start my own blog but I was going to do absolutely everything myself. I learned everything from start to finish and as I went along, designed my entire site and took as many courses as I could. Now here I am writing my first post, with so much to say and still so much more to learn.
As you might expect, as a blogger there are many options and many roads you can take on the internet. But I do have a game plan and I know things can change, but I want to continue blogging of course, then I will be creating course content for my own online makeup academy.
I will also produce content for a YouTube channel, I would love to write a book about makeup artistry and even about my personal story, I’d love to create my own cosmetics brand and create a great influencer roll for my readers. For my service based business at home, I plan on building a beauty bus, a huge studio with my cosmetics store inside and with makeup, esthetics, hairstyling and lash/brow bar. I will also have my own makeup academy attached to it all.
Right now I have my studio and office in my basement and I have all my travel equipment to go on set and to work at weddings and such, but I obviously want more. This summer I am starting a business mentoring program so that I can do my business plan and apply for grants and business loans so I can begin to expand my business goals.
But for right now I want to focus on blogging and all of my online business endeavors and I hope to grow this team to bring all of you and my future readers amazing content to learn and to be more knowledgeable on many topics.
But I must let you in on a secret, this is all just small paragraphs on each topic within my life so that each of you could get to know me a bit better. This is all clearly not my entire life story and history behind everything but it gives you a general outline about the topics that I am passionate about and the things that have shaped me into who I am today as a woman.
But I will definitely elaborate on each of the topics and subtopics I mentioned here today so that you all will get to know who I truly am inside and out. I will get to share my story on a national level to bring awareness and knowledge. Also, my true love and passion is makeup and being a makeup artist so I want to be able to help and teach all of the beauty and makeup lovers out there and anyone who is or wants to become a makeup artist or start a business especially within the beauty industry. I am truly blessed to be doing this and there will be much more to come in the future.
Thank you all for listening and please share to spread the word about my new and glamorous blog.
Love, Kristina xoxo